I’ve always been immensely proud of my sexuality, and make sure people know, not because I think it is cool, but because I want people to acknowledge it. And despite being so sure of my own, I never really knew or understood what the community or the situation surrounding queer people was.
I still to this day don’t understand many of the terms or discomfort people feel towards a queer person. And while I would love to, I cannot claim to be a part of the community because while I do identify as bisexual, I don’t think I’ve done anything to be associated with the others from it.
I may not be as informed about many things as I’d like to be. Because despite being in the community, you can still be out of touch with reality or just with how things seem to be. While I don’t know if that’s a good or a bad thing, I’m looking at it as a negative.
Wow! Another post of you rambling, Simone. What even are you on about? Good Question! I thought I had a fair idea of what I wanted to talk about, but we’ll go with the flow!
I Put The Bi in Bitter
I love making puns. Why? Because I enjoy distracting myself and other people by making them question my sanity instead of their own. But also, because who doesn’t love terrible puns? If you don’t believe me, you should check this post out!
And yes, let’s get this over with. OMG, I’m BiSeXuAl! I love talking about it so much that I wrote a whole ass post about it. Okay, now that we’ve got this out of the way, let’s move on.
I may be open and proud of my sexuality, but I’m so out of touch with the community and everything that comes with it – this includes pop culture references too. And yes, I feel so stupid talking about this particular aspect and have briefly mentioned it, but this is doing wonders for my anxiety, so BEAR WITH ME!
I knew I loved women from an incredibly young age, but my first crush has to be Shego from Kim Possible. And before any of you judge me – LOOK AT HER! Who wouldn’t have a crush on her?
But let’s talk about why I liked her. Apart from being incredibly badass, she looked different, is sarcastic, and is a powerful woman who didn’t need to and want to deal with anyone’s bullshit. Not only did I like Shego, for some reason, but I wanted to grow up and be Shego. And even though there was no indication about what her sexual preference is (seeing how it was a kids show), many believe that Shego secretly had a thing for Kim Possible.
And if you think about it, I did incorporate some of Shego’s sass and goth aesthetic at some point in my life. So mission accomplished?
Eat. Gay. Love.
Shego may have been my sexual awakening, but the first canonically bi character I encountered next was Callie from Grey’s Anatomy. And let me say, I wasn’t expecting it in the least bit.
Let me explain.
I hadn’t seen a character struggle to come to terms with her sexuality, and honestly, for the first time, I could relate. While they didn’t make her sexuality her personality trait, watching her navigate through all of her emotions, made me feel like I was a part of that journey too. It’s been a while since I last watched the show. But from what I remember, Callie showed us all the good, the bad, and the ugly, and I loved that.
I mean, yes. I’d love to see a healthy gay relationship for once, and Callie was in one, for a hot minute. But this is Grey’s Anatomy, you guys. Apart from giving me my first bisexual character, it also taught me what pain was.
RIP 007, Mark, and Derek!
But here’s where things get murky. I feel like I’ve seen various bisexual characters before and after Callie, but the one’s we will be talking about today are characters that stayed with me.
Homo Sweet Homo
It has been two years since I’ve been out, but I always seemed to miss out on LGBTQ+ characters in shows for the simple reason that I wasn’t looking for them. Shows like Pretty Little Liars, Gossip Girl, Vampire Diaries, Glee and more had a few characters sprinkled around. But I either forgot about them or never ended up watching the show long enough to connect with them.
Oddly enough, I enjoyed Glee solely because of their renditions of popular songs. And they had 3 characters in the supporting cast that was a part of the community. But it always felt like a trope to carry their story forward instead of just being a part of their natural character arc.
What did catch my attention was a show my best friend recommended, and while it was so much more than the character’s sexuality, it did portray a collectively natural reaction towards it. One Day At A Time made me feel so many emotions. It made me think something was wrong with me. Because not only was it a fresh breath of air among most of the trash I consumed on Netflix, it also made me pay more attention to how I conduct myself around others from the community.
I keep saying I was out of the touch with everything that happened, but it started to seem like I was oblivious only because I chose to be that way.
Another show that caught me by surprise was Brooklyn Nine-Nine. I mean, seeing how woke the show is, I shouldn’t have been, but I was! Raymond Holt is an iconic character for a lot of reasons, but they didn’t thrust his sexuality onto us, and while we do understand he’s gay – the subtlety is so in character for him!
However, I want to talk about Rosa Diaz. Oddly enough, in some ways, she reminds of Shebo, which explains why I have the biggest possible crush on her. Even before she ‘came out’ on the show, for some reason, I was expecting it. You could blame it on preconceived notions or call it wishful thinking, but it was nice to see the way they handled it all.
Not only did they show us her relationship with her suitors, but we also got to see how her family reacted to and then dealt with it. Her bisexuality has never been the focus of her story at any given point. It still isn’t.
And I think it’s fair to say that Rosa Diaz has my heart. [Take note, ladies!]
Recently though, I’ve watched two shows that have been an absolute favourite! The first would be from the Haunting series! *Spoiler Alert* Even though both the seasons had bisexual characters in it, the fans (me included) preferred the second season, despite the first season giving us a somewhat happier ending for the couple.
However, season 2 – The Haunting of Bly Manor was so much more than the protagonist’s (Dani) sexuality. And while some think it’s nothing but a cliche lesbian relationship, we got to watch it evolve and grow with their characters. The creators never specified what her sexuality is. The only takeaway from her backstory is that she was going to marry a man, but watching her fall for her partner (Jamie) made me happier than any of my relationships ever did.
And finally, we come to what’s now become my favourite.
I joined the Schitt’s Creek party late, well after they drew the curtains and gracefully bid us adieu. Everything about this show makes me feel some way! And even though I have so many favourites, the “Wine” conversation will always be numero uno! Not only did they have an open discussion about David’s sexuality, but they found a way to do it without making it the butt of the joke. How? By showing David and Stevie have the “Wine” conversation.
It’s rare to find shows that have a refreshing take on LGBTQ+ characters for various reasons. But the most common aspect has been dramatizing everything a queer character does, in jest, or to put them in a bad light. And shows like Schitt’s Creek, Sex Education, One Day At A Time and more are working towards educating people while entertaining them – which is not only a refreshing change but a welcome one too!
And while we have a long way to go in respect of acceptable queer representation in media, I believe we’re going down the right path. Most of the characters I’ve mentioned in this post happen to be from shows I’ve watched and happened to like.
The reason I wanted to talk about these shows wasn’t that I’m obsessed with how good they are or were at some point. I wanted to point out what they mean for me. Because it’s not about representation, it’s about normalising something so pure, that you tend to forget the trauma surrounding it. And I’m aware that there are other shows as well, but if you happen to have a favourite or want to push me to watch something else – let me know below!
And if you enjoy my endless ramblings, you can find more of my work here!